Pope Palpatine: "Gays did it!"

Papal Pope Palpatine -everyone's favourite Catholic Führer- used to be the head of the Organisation That Blames Innocents at Random, formerly known as the Organisation That Blames and Burns Innocents at Random (the Inquisition) finally decided to deal with this little problem he had to deal with. Obviously his research has been thorough, he warned Bishops about from talking to the cops when he was still Grand Inquisitor and that's some time ago, and it's been fruitful! The whole nonchalant 'i couldn't care less' and 'it's less then 1% of the Priests who did this' attitude was just a façade - he was secretly investigating it all along! And guess who did it?! Gays, of course! This is not just some filthy baseless accusation and trick to get rid of gays in the Church, it's the truth!